beardedlamb

SO tired of this jobless thing. i’ve wrapped up oob accounting and we did way better than breaking even. i’m so good at that thing, that oob thing. and nobody in the working world cares. i’ve been trolling craigslist all day today. saw a post for a part-time webcast technician job. they said they wanted a cover letter from someone who was interested in the internet, that was unique and that dull things tend to get deleted. i sent this:

Ping Pong is one of human man’s most treasured and under-appreciated accomplishments. George Carlin said tennis is not a sport, it’s just ping pong played standing on the table. From its diplomatic bridge building (re: The US team visiting the Chinese national team in the 70s as communist tensions rent Asian into Cold War factions), to its attic and basement underdog glory stories (re: My beating fellow traveling comic and number 1 seed Bill Stern [whose father was nationally ranked in pong at one point] in an Ohio basement tourney while on tour in 2005), ping pong, table tennis, paddley-balley, whatever you want to call it, has entrenched itself into the hearts and minds of knowing contenders of all ages, heights, and creeds. What would you have Forrest Gump do, master 4-square? I think not.
If we are to have taken any wisdom from the lives and works of George Carlin, Tom Hanks, and Bill Stern, it must be that ping pong is more than just a jagov college co-op activity like la crosse. It is what makes America America and it must be treasured.
Totally fake but totally sweet

Jeremy Lamb (of the Harlem Lambs)
512 293 1905

i won’t get it. don’t care.
more trolling tomorrow.

jeremy