something you can't touch

every once in a while the good show will happen to you. as the lights go down at the end, you wonder why there has to be any other feeling in the world. nothing can come close to that rush. to know you have succeeded in doing such a difficult task. you have created an original story with your best friends that was dynamic, hilarious, and inspiring. it's a feeling i am constantly chasing like an addict chases his drug. i am forever in pursuit of the notion of extreme sublime prov. saturday, we touched the void... for 17 people in Dayton, OH.

in a way it was upsetting that only so few people saw our show, but in a lot of ways it may not have happened any other way. jon proposed the question at lunch today: if you could go back and erase your past, keeping all of your current knowledge, how far back would you go. you could go back to when you were 10 and relive life from that point exccept have the brains you have now. i immediately said, day 1. bill said he wasn't sure if he wanted to go back at all because he was happy with his life and didn't want to accidentally end up somewhere else than in the very long john silver's of vandalia we were at. i thought about how bored i would be playing with blocks instead of ladies and opted to go back to freshman year of high school. there's definitely a few things i would change but plenty that i would try to keep identical.
for instance:
i maxed out my bench today. haven't touched a bench press since freshman year football in high school. back then, i maxed out at 145. today, i touched another void. i benched 160. tuesday, i will return to the Y by my grandparent's house here in vandalia, OH and see if i can get 165, nay 170.

may have a big announcement with many brain spillings on the horizon. stay tuned.
reach for your prov.

b